Writing Wings For You

Marie Lukasik Wallace ~ # I LIVE Poetry – I'm passionate about life and writing and all things creative and poetic!


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What I’ve Learned – How simple it is to CHOOSE JOY

joy

On Tuesday and Wednesday mornings in our first grade community circle, we choose one positive word for the day to be all day.  I do this because it used to be what we did in January as our New Year resolution. It was a simple thing for first graders to remember, one word versus a phrase.   Frankly, it’s easy for all of us to remember one word.   We do an art project with it wherein we tear little scrap papers and make rainbow letters on a 3×5 card.   Then, we hang it in our cubbies.   Like anything that remains in one place, sometimes it’s forgotten.

So last year, I implemented positive words for Tuesday because they were easy to remember how to be that word all day long.  Sometimes we write them on our desk.  Then Wednesday, we would have our Plus one day.  We would be our word for Tuesday and then another positive word for Wednesday.  (It’s always nice to have a goal to look forward to.)

What I learned, just holding the word “Joy” in my head all day, changes my thinking.  When I change my thinking, I change my energy level.  Holding this positive energy level allows those things that might otherwise change my day to roll off my back and not exist or change form.  I’m happier….the kids are happier.

We have a phrase posted in our room that says, “Be kind in all you say and do and acts of kindness follow you.”   And now we interchange that word.  Be respectful in all you say and do and acts of respect follow you.     Be JOY-FULL in all you say and do and acts of JOY follow you.

Try it out!   You will be surprised at the acts of joy that follow you.

Merry Christmas my dear friends or happiness and joy in whatever holiday season you may be celebrating, even if it’s the holiday of you.

Namaste,  Marie  :0)


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I Live Poetry

#‎Ilivepoetry‬

It’s poetry when you get to play
This little piggy went to the market
With your 77 year old father and he
Gets all excited for the wee wee wee
All the way home part.
(He does it by the third toe
and scares you.)
And then 2 days later hear
The same song is sung by a mom to
Her 2 year old and hear the child
Say “again, mama, again.”
And imagining your daddy
Being that 2 year old saying that to his mama.


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My Daddy

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Many of you know that I am writing my daddy’s story, a Junkman’s Journey.  And you know he is a vaulted man with Alzheimer’s and that the journey has not been an easy one, but we have found a beautiful road together and we have been finding the gold in each other.

Yesterday, he had a stroke, and he will be in the hospital a few days at least…maybe longer.  What is difficult is that the left side of his body is not responding well, and his speech is slurred.  But he’s hanging in there.  I have been beyond blessed having the time I have had with him.  The hard part is “Will I get to know more about him?  Will he still have his memories?”   I cherish any and all time I have…so I hope you know I’m not complaining.  It’s just not easy when you finally get a peek in the vault and there’s a possibility that it will close forever.   The good news is that I’ve gotten a chance to see the treasure, and I’ve gotten to have a chance to have more of a relationship that I ever hoped.

And lastly, the good news is that I had just sent him a couple of my chapters of his story for him to read.  He said that it made him cry and that I described things in a way that made it seem I was there.  It brought him back to the exact moment and all that he felt scared and happy and all were present when he read it.  That feels good to know you have honored someone in a way that they deserve to be honored, especially when you are telling their story.

And for the first time, he said, “I’m proud of you.”  No matter what, I have been so blessed to have these tiny moments of time with him that I never would have had, had I not asked those first questions.

Love on your people…all those precious people in your life…and ask them lots of questions!

Namaste my friends,

Marie


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Digging for Gold in the Soul – #1

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My daddy has been a vaulted man for most of my life.  I never understood why.  I only knew that as a child and an adult I yearned for him to talk to me…tell me things about him.  The child in me longed for the stories and the adventures.   But the human in me wanted a deeper relationship, to talk and go do things together.  There’s something about a little girl and her daddy, or at least what I interpreted from watching my friends with their dads.

It’s been 3 years since I’ve began my quest to get to know daddy.  I can’t tell you what prompted me to begin this journey, but I think it was intuition, or maybe it was that I sat still long enough to listen.  I began with curiosity and a book.  The book had questions in it.  As I perused the book, I realized that I didn’t know a lot of basic things about my dad.  Sure there were the obvious things I didn’t know like our family tree and how he met my mom or why she left.  But really I didn’t even know simple things like his favorite color or favorite food or even family traditions.

I told dad about the book and showed it to him.  He looked at it curiously.  “What do you think dad?” I asked hopefully, and he answered, “sure, I could probably do that.”   Inside, I was elated, and I wanted to grab him and hug him, but I knew I didn’t want to scare him.  He was like a frightened  deer talking about anything more than the weather and fishing and/or tractors. 

The first year was peppered with just a few questions here and there, about every few days or sometimes just once a week.  At first, I could only ask daddy really simple questions like family tree information or things he liked or didn’t like.  That was safe enough.

However, if I asked a question that was too deep, he feigned an “I don’t know” or a “I have to go and fix dinner now”  or “I’ll get back to that” (which he never did.)  I could hear in his voice that I had hit a nerve and the pain was too raw to look at.  Those were days he had looked at once and tucked away for good.

But there was something that kept him coming back.  Was it that every one of us wants to leave a legacy of some sort?  Is it that everyone wants to leave some small part of themselves in this world to know they had not lived their life in vein?  

Also, at first, daddy would only answer the questions that were in the book.  If I was there in person, he would peek over to make sure the question was in the book.  He still didn’t trust me, and that was okay.  Fortunately for me, I knew that I shouldn’t go off track, or he might not talk anymore.  Actually, most of the time I worried if one day he would just stop answering questions.  And I realized that worry didn’t serve me.  I was learning more about dad than I ever had.  It was these little gold nuggets that I kept digging up.  Like gold, you cherish each little bit you find, even the flecks.

Fast forward three years, to last night.  I chatted just a short chat with my daddy before he went to bed.  I helped him calm his fears because nighttime is evil to him.  (He has Sundowners.)  And I told him, “I love you daddy and sleep well.”   His words back to me were simple, but went straight to the heart.

                           “Thanks for being nice to me.”

Wow.  Six little words that startled me into reality.  Isn’t that what we ALL want?  …someone to be nice to us, especially in a world that is sometimes cruel.  We just want to know someone cares.  And sometimes it’s in the simple things…talking on the phone and ask them about themselves.  Daddy responded, as I think I would, grateful that someone was nice to me.  It’s always been a journey for me to find the gold in every soul I meet, even those I might not care for or understand…it’s there.  Now it’s my mission to find it and cherish it all people.  There are so many treasures I have yet to meet.

                                   Got a shovel?  It’s time to dig!

*Disclaimer:  I am not saying this will work for every person.  But I do know this, that most of the time when you take the time to listen and ask questions, that people respond.  Sometimes you have to sift through the response to see what is there, and look deep for what this person is offering you, no matter how small.    

Have a most blessed day my fellow friends,

~Nemaste,  Marie